(look at you)
with slices of the moon on your finger tips,
with the sun embedded in your palms
lightning archs faintly pulse and race
under your skin
on your tongue
with wisps of clouds forming your hair
then it trickles down,
pooling behind your eyes
oh no...

it's your eyes that i can't remember
or, i'm hesitant to

because

if i imagine you looking at me for simply
one
second

i'll implode
or combust
i shall return to dust
avert my eyes out of politeness
sheer what-was-it-even- my words
my tongue twists and you're just there
looking on still
not seeing

time passes and
i corner my eye
(look at you)
putik as you said, made of mud
mixed with embers alive on your skin
fixed to the curve of your smile,
tracing the split in your chest
(next to your heart)
flared across your nose like a blush
but
i see-
there's traces of ash there too, mixed in
difficult to focus on
but the scent, of being burnt out
i'm familiar with

i hold my breath still
hold my gaze for a few beats of your thundering heart
and subside, subvert my gaze
i look away

my mouth tastes of blood
i'm biting my tongue

i wish i knew where you came from

all i can do is fill in the spaces
with my own assumptions

and it isn't right
it isn't enough for me.

bite-sized are easy to swallow
but not when i hunger for more
not when i'm outgrowing my baby teeth
not when i'm aware i can hold onto you
grip you tight
between my canines,
sometimes my molars when the hunger is bad enough
but
it's alright,
you aren't the stale pieces of bones
stuck between my teeth
sharp and uninviting because of the people they used to be

don't worry
i wouldn't want it one-way
i may ask for too much so,
if you'd like, you can have pieces of me, too
so you aren't hungry any more

i'll even pull apart my own scars
with webs of nerves still attached
still sensitive, never-ending
and hold them in my palms for you to see

behold-
my true self!
these stripes aren't mine right now,
but they are me
from the past, they belong
in a way
but i refuse to hide them

although i'm still afraid you'll
turn me away
i hope you accept me as i am
as i'm learning who you are

(now look at you)
i haven't the confidence to but
i'd like to hold you
for a (long) while

we'll be alright

i'll unbare my teeth
(and you do the same)
so i can feel your lips